


What an Infernal Sense of Humor

by fandomshere_fandomsthere



Category: Villainous (Cartoon)
Genre: Black Hat loves puns, Gen, I had a headcanon and I wanted to elaborate on it so here we are, This is just something silly, everyone else Most Certainly Does Not, puns
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-17
Updated: 2017-07-17
Packaged: 2018-12-03 13:49:31
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 860
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11533539
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fandomshere_fandomsthere/pseuds/fandomshere_fandomsthere
Summary: Black Hat hates puns when anyone else says them. On the other hand, he LOVES dishing them out...





	What an Infernal Sense of Humor

**Author's Note:**

> This is completely silly and self-indulgent. I shared a headcanon with my girlfriend that Black Hat hates hearing puns but loves telling them, and she said she could totally see it, so...*gestures to fic*

            Black Hat peeked in the lab through the window in the door. He saw Flug at his chemistry station, fully concentrated on what he was doing. Demencia was there as well, laying on the floor with headphones in, her eyes closed as she played an air guitar. 5.0.5 was in the corner of the room in his maid outfit, dusting off shelves. Everyone was so absorbed in their own tasks that there was no way they’d notice him.

            _Perfect._

Black Hat grinned maliciously to himself and entered the lab as quietly as possible, the door shutting silently behind him. The bear was humming—or rumbling, rather—to himself, Demencia’s eyes were still shut tight as she played along to the music, and Flug’s back was turned. Black Hat snuck up on the scientist slowly, trying to decide what sort of horrific face to have his face shape into in order to scare Flug out of his wits. His grin widened when he thought of something even better than simply scaring the doctor: _annoying_ him.

            Flug didn’t notice the demon leaning over his shoulder; he didn’t even register the hot breath on his neck. So when Black Hat grabbed his sides, Flug let out an ungodly, high-pitched screech and flung the test tube he was holding into the air. Luckily enough, none of the chemical spilled out of it. Unluckily, it shattered when it hit the table.

            “Why _hello_ there, doctor! Did I startle you?” Black Hat asked, grin widening even further.

            “You could say that, sir,” Flug gasped, clutching at his chest. He winced as Black Hat’s clutches tightened, claws poking at his sides through his lab coat. “Is there—is there something you need?”

            “There _is,_ actually,” Black hat said. “You know, Flug, I’ve been thinking…” He rested his head on Flug’s shoulder, delighting in the way he squirmed. “I don’t know why we’re not closer. We could be the best of friends, you and I…we have such great—”

            “ _Jefecito,_ don’t you _dare—”_

 _“Chemistry,”_ Black Hat said, picking up a piece of the shattered test tube. Flug groaned and covered his face with his hands, and Black Hat laughed.

            “I can never get any work done around here,” Flug said miserably.

            “That’s your own fault, dear doctor,” Black Hat said, giving the lenses of Flug’s goggles a flick. He walked away, still chuckling to himself, while the scientist sighed and began cleaning up the mess.

            “5.0.5!” Black Hat said as he neared the door. The bear snapped to attention immediately, spinning around so fast that the feather duster in his paw slipped out of it and flew across the room. “After you're done with that, go dust the mantle. I can’t…” Black Hat hid a snort behind his hand. “I can’t _bear_ to see it so messy.”

            5.0.5 and Flug both groaned at the same time. Black Hat made his way out of the lab, cackling all the way. Demencia propped herself up on her elbows, taking an earbud out and looking at the exasperated expressions of her coworkers with a raised eyebrow.

            “Did I miss something?” she asked.

            “Just Black Hat’s puns,” Flug said as he brushed glass shards into a trash can.

            “Thank God,” Demencia said. She laid back down and resumed her jam session.

* * *

 

            Black Hat struck again two mornings later.

            Demencia was in the kitchen, making herself breakfast while listening to some song that was all guitar riffs, obscenely loud drum solos, and out-of-tune singing. She sang along, just as off-key as the band itself, dancing as she made pancakes—and a huge mess. Black Hat was waiting around the corner, in the living room, waiting for the perfect opportunity. It arose when she opened the fridge. When the door closed, Black Hat was standing behind it, a playful grin stretching across his features.

            “Good morning Demencia,” he said. She squealed and lost her balance, taken aback by his sudden appearance. Black Hat watched, amused, as she fell into the refrigerator door, the milk jug almost falling out of her hands.

            “Morning Black Hat!” she said once she recovered.

            “What are you listening to?” Black Hat asked, feigning interest.

            The acting worked; Demencia grinned widely and launched into an explanation on how this was her _favorite_ song by her _favorite_ band and how she wanted to kidnap them and hold them in the basement, forcing them to play music for her all day.

            “So, this is your favorite song?” Black Hat asked.

            “Yeah! Definitely!” Demencia agreed enthusiastically, nodding and bouncing up and down.

            “Would you say it’s your…” Black Hat reached into the fridge, pulling out a jar. “… _jam?”_

            Demencia’s eyes widened in betrayal before she groaned, leaning backwards on to the counter. Black Hat laughed uproariously and tossed the jar of strawberry jam over his shoulder as he walked away. Demencia scrambled to catch it. Flug walked in just as Black Hat was leaving, looking behind himself with a concerned expression.

            “Puns,” Demencia grumbled.

            “Poor you.” Flug patted her head and started up the coffee maker.

            They could still hear Black Hat’s laughter echoing down the halls.

**Author's Note:**

> As always, thank you for reading! <3


End file.
